Hiccups, why?

I think I get hiccups more often than most people. And almost always for some seemingly unapparent reason. Well, not always, usually after I eat or drink. The point is, I am an adult and I feel like hiccups are more of a kid’s thing. When was the last time you were in a business meeting and someone had the hiccups? The answer is NEVER.

But kid’s can have hiccups at anytime and it’s not weird. And so I launched myself into the world of hiccups and I am sharing my discoveries with you here.

The key questions are: Where to hiccups come from? Why? And most importantly, how to get rid of them!

Where:

Hiccups come from an involuntary contraction in the diaphragm. This cases brief closures in the vocal chords creating the “hiccup” sound.

Why:

So far there is no clear understanding but hiccups have been attributed to eating or drinking too fast. I am willing to place some clear bets that that IS the answer. I have a fear of starvation and so often look like a raccoon at a garbage can when I ate. Just can’t shovel it in my face fast enough!! And kids are just the same. Most adults are refined enough to chew their food and then swallow. Not hoover their food and then hiccup.

How to get rid of them:

No sound advice. They should go away in a couple minutes. If not, the interwebs tell me, you’ve got a serious condition. You need to see a doctor.

Also, I wanted to insert an image of someone hicupping but it was weird and gross so I omitted it. You’re welcome.

“Like a Prayer” by Madonna

Listen here:

Kumbaya here:

Life is a mystery, everyone must stand alone
I hear you call my name
And it feels like home

When you call my name it’s like a little prayer
I’m down on my knees, I wanna take you there
In the midnight hour I can feel your power
Just like a prayer you know I’ll take you there

I hear your voice, it’s like an angel sighing
I have no choice, I hear your voice
Feels like flying
I close my eyes, Oh God I think I’m falling
Out of the sky, I close my eyes
Heaven help me

When you call my name it’s like a little prayer
I’m down on my knees, I wanna take you there
In the midnight hour I can feel your power
Just like a prayer you know I’ll take you there

Like a child you whisper softly to me
You’re in control just like a child
Now I’m dancing
It’s like a dream, no end and no beginning
You’re here with me, it’s like a dream
Let the choir sing

When you call my name it’s like a little prayer
I’m down on my knees, I wanna take you there
In the midnight hour I can feel your power
Just like a prayer you know I’ll take you there

Just like a prayer, your voice can take me there
Just like a muse to me, you are a mystery
Just like a dream, you are not what you seem
Just like a prayer, no choice your voice can take me there

Just like a prayer, I’ll take you there
It’s like a dream to me

Volunteer of the Year Nominee

It is with much honor and excitement that I share with you my recent nomination for Volunteer of the Year Award with Youth Challenge International.

I was selected after a call for nominations went out to YCI’s country field offices, partners and headquarter staff. Each was encouraged to nominate standout volunteers who had a significant impact on programming Please see their super nice write-up here.

“Take on me” by A-Ha

Listen here:

Kumbaya here:

So, you’re in the danger zone, now what?

Uh oh, you got yourself into the danger zone. You know what I’m talking about. You said or did or said and did something you did or did not mean — and then you used a shovel or bulldozer or digging mechanism of choice to dig your own grave.  OH Ho HO — Someone is MAD at YOU!

How to check yourself, even after you’ve wrecked yourself.

5 Easy Steps:

*FOLLOW THEM EXACTLY and you’ll win every time. Deviate, and you’re done

1. IMMEDIATELY ADMIT FAULT. I mean IMMEDIATELY. Apologize profusely. At least fifteen times.

2. Say something like “I don’t know WHAT I was thinking. How could I have told you … you look fat/your best friend’s a bitch/flipped on you for buying ANOTHER pair of shoes/this is the worst dinner in the history of food/your new eyeshadow makes you look like Ursula from the Little Mermaid/oh THAT’s what taupe is?! I didn’t mean ANY of that!!”

3. Then say something like, “You look great!/Your best friend is amazing/You can have all the shoes you want/No no, I did really like dinner – I just ate a bucket of shit before hand so it was distorting the taste – we should go out for dinner more often, my treat, and I should stop eating so many buckets of shit/I meant your new eyeshadow looks magical – like Disney! You look like a princess/Of course I know what color taupe is! Doesn’t everyone?”

4. BE CUTE. I mean SUPER super SUPER cute. Do not be defensive. That will make your grave turn into quicksand. The key here is 3 things.

A) Remorse. Show remorse. You feel BAD. You did something WROOOONG. And you are SORRY!!!

B) Tone. The tone changes everything. Example. “You look nice today!”–GOOD!!! Or “You *pause* look *pause* nice to — day …” BAAAAAD!!!

C) Everyone has a cute thing. Find yours. What is it? Can you make puppy eyes? Do you make a funny face? Are you a jokster? Use this strength to your advantage. You need to. She/He will eat you alive – don’t underestimate his/her abilities.

5. STATE, not ASK, STATE, even exclaim! “I will make it up to you!” A variety of things can follow from here; the usual, flowers, chocolates, or go creative!

Make a card. Plan a dinner. Suggest an activity you can do together that he/she has been nagging you to do together – this can include but is not limited to: trying hot yoga, taking a knitting class, and going sky diving.

The key to this last step is that you FOLLOW THROUGH – and in a timely manner.

Otherwise, guess what? You’re back in the danger zone!!!

“Fools Rush In” by Elvis

Listen & Sing-a-long here!

Spring 2012

LIKES:

• Corningware – I LOVE IT! As far as I’m concerned, it is the porn of dinnerware
• Ikea – because they pack things really efficiently in their tiny tiny boxes
• The sun. It makes me happy.
• Jelly Belly jellybeans – it’s shocking how many I can eat. I feel super super (SUPER) sick after
• Backpacks. I don’t care if I look like I’m 12. I look like that anyways. The backpack just helps to reinforce that and helps me carry my things around conveniently
• Disney songs. Every single one of them can be turned into a dance party
• I like to hang out at the grocery store. But not when I’m hungry.

DISLIKES:

• The word “sure”. What does it even mean? It doesn’t sound affirmative. And I only work in absolutes.
• Waiting to get off the plane. GET ME OFF NOOOOOOOOW!!!!
• Pink soap. I just don’t trust it. Like where did you come from? That color, that SMELL! It’s not natural.
• Santana. Period.
• When you don’t like what you ordered at the restaurant…I hate being disappointed with food. And then paying for it.
• That whiff you get when opening a bag of store bought bagels is enough to induce vomit
• Oddly, I dislike charging my phone. This could be solved with multiple chargers stationed around the home, and/or the city.